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  • Writer's pictureMatraca Beesley

When I'm Anxious...

Updated: Sep 13, 2021

Do you ever have those days, when your mind just won't shut off? That's me, right now. If you have them, I just want you to know you're not alone. It's hard to shut your mind off when there are so many chaotic things going on around us.

I am undeniably anxious as I sit at work, and I can't even begin to explain why. I'm not worried or scared, but have that tickling anxious feeling. Uneasy, can't relax, but can't pinpoint the trigger to this feeling.

Today's been another normal day. Woke up, did housework, got Jesse's coffee poured as I got my Spark ready for the day. Riley got up early, helped me out and cleaned her room, and the morning went on per usual. We got to see the turkeys as we left, and the morning was gorgeous.

So why these feelings? I don't know, and I'm not sure I'll ever know. These days hit, and these days pass, and while I pray through them, they still have to pass by in His time. My verse of the week right now is 1 Corinthians 16:13 and it reads (NKJV), "Watch, stand fast in the faith, be brave, be strong." I have been working to stand fast in the faith, because I know that He is here and He will lead me through all that life has in store for me.

Something that helps me on days like this is to write down what I am thankful for, what I need to pray over, and what is (to my knowledge) making me feel anxious and uneasy. Then I pray over it and at least it's out of my hands and back into God's where it belongs. It's not a perfect fix, I don't always feel at ease immediately, but it helps me to focus on other things and not on things I cannot control or change.

Things that I can choose to focus on are that I have a God who loves me, my family who loves me, and a life that I love. I can think about the past few weeks (of which I've been silent because I haven't known what to write about), and all the things that have happened. From hiking with my sister and her husband, Riley catching her first fish, close encounters with "our" turkeys, Jesse getting to enjoy his shop and weld, to my first Etsy sale & brand new decal! I'll share them below!

Please read this and remember, that through it all.. The happiness, heartbreak, anxiety, and turmoil, God is there for you, and where He is, there is also joy.

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